BUT SERIOUSLY: Big Bad Monkey Balls: Satan’s Altar Boy



Attention, condoners of militant Christian insanity!

Have you ever wondered why people JUST LIKE YOU have taken the bait and become outright murderous devils for a master who enables them? It’s a wonderful program called religious indoctrination.

I cannot stress enough the necessity for all Targeted Individuals to examine their own possible involuntary indoctrination into induced peer-pressure belief systems that can be introduced too early early in one’s life to allow a distinction of choice, and can stunt inspiration and lead to irrational camaraderies simply because someone professes an affinity to acceptable and even authorized superstition. Such unchecked emotional seducements, when underscored by nationalistic agencies, can easily lead to the creation of myrmidon armies.

SURPRISE! Christians, as with any other victim of religious indoctrination, are in the same boat with Muslims, Jews, and Satanists.

Careful! Don’t rock the religion boat. There are so many hypocrites unwilling to testify, in the event of possible upheaval.

Oh, I know the stance so many of you have taken in defense of your dedication to the supposed virtues of your own tailor-made belief system. Modern religious apologists have expertly cherry-picked their favorite bits and pieces of ancient mythology while conveniently glossing over the abject barbarism that brought that entire mythology into existence in the first place. It’s a superstition that enslaves the mind and enriches the pockets of the religiously cunning.

And the respective nationalistic military masters of these religions, throughout history, have all done the exact same thing—-utilizing their own respective, mutually insupportable ancient scriptures—-to justify the premeditated torture and destruction of people they have all commanded their own adherents to despise and excoriate.

BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS  thinks he’s a soldier of God. Isn’t that special!

Let’s delve further into the politicization of religion. The Bible is advertised by its proponents as the impeccable “Truth of God.” However, in matters of U.S. national and global interests, how is it possible that Armageddon militants and their more pacifistic, less literally extremist Christian counterparts have each arrived at opposite conclusions concerning the so-called “Truth of God” derived from the exact same text? How could it be that such a supposedly sacred text inspired by your supposedly infallible creator can be so simplistically manipulated one way or the other in support of two completely antithetical viewpoints?

Well, in support of the more pacifistic Christian apologists, we could  all blame the aforementioned nationalistic military masters of militant profiteering for such a deplorable degeneration of scriptural analysis; but first, let’s place the onus upon actual troops JUST LIKE YOU, who are at this very moment  committing the heinous crime of Organized Stalking and Electronic Torture (also called “Neighborhood Watch”), and perhaps we shall come to realize that the two-sided coin of modern Christian ethics vs. dogma  cannot quite be separated from itself, even after the typical brainwashed “Soldier of God” has performed his predictable “pass-the-buck,”  “just following orders,”  saber-rattling war-dance around his bonfire of illustrious rationalization and distraction.

But what the hell. We’ve got a minute or two. Stop dancing with the Invisible Man in the Sky for a moment,  you big righteous star you, and let’s start realizing that he’s the same dancing partner that hell-bent human devils have been using to justify their own imagined deifications of rape and murder for millennia.

Four assumptions first come to mind whenever I wonder aloud about your Christian brother—-that hell-bent human devil and his proud chosen path of government-sanctioned torture and destruction:

  1. Possibly, hell-bent human devils have always purposely misinterpreted what has been written in scripture in order to further their Satanic agenda.
  2. Possibly, hell-bent human devils are misguided puppets who have placed undue emphasis on Old Testament verses that are rife with commandments to murder, rape, pillage, and ostracize in the name of God; and greater emphasis must be given to the New Testament teachings of Jesus—-hmm, well, except for some  teachings, such as when Jesus talks about drawing one’s sword in the “end times” and other pernicious New Testament bloopers that reinforce the position of said hell-bent human devils.
  3. Possibly, hell-bent human devils believe we are all in the revelatory “end times” that are prophesied throughout  the scripture as a call to arms for all righteous arbiters of a prompt and necessary Armageddon; moreover, it has been drilled into their heads that their opponents in this “necessary” war are the real  devils, and must be expediently neutralized.
  4. Possibly, there really is no need for hell-bent human devils to misinterpret the teachings of the Bible. Perhaps hell-bent human devils are the way they are simply because that is what the Bible explicitly teaches them to be: self-exalting soldiers of an illusory deity that wants its followers to enact mandatory discrimination against non-adherents of a traditionally acceptable irrational document that tolerates slavery, permits torture, and condemns free thought. More to the point, perhaps it’s the more pacifistic, less literally extremist Christians who’ve got the entire message of actual Christianity completely wrong.

If you’re honest about it, you can easily observe that a U.S. military master’s victory campaign is derived entirely from Christian revelatory scripture. The mere observance that U. S. militarization has been specifically spearheaded to protect Israel at all costs—-despite all of the do-si-doing Middle East “switching partners”  that has taken place during recent decades—-is ample evidence of the stigma of religious indoctrination in places where it specifically ought not to be : in high government positions. Only then, once you have acknowledged this fact,  will you perfectly understand exactly how simple it is to convince any gullible, anxious, self-absorbed, needy Tool of the State that Armageddon has arrived, and how imperative it would be to join forces with “The Lord” or be condemned for “all eternity” along with all the rest of the “unenlightened” rabble. Under these kill-or-be-killed religious bullying tactics, any and all spineless, shiftless fools can be brainwashed into imagining that “The Lord” commands them to “smite the evildoer,” and that “the evildoer” is whomever “The Lord” says it is at the appropriate smite-time.

And now, consider actually getting paid  to smite that nasty old evildoer for “The Lord.” Yahoo! Congratulations! You’re in the Army now! You are now BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS, an employed murdering contractee of an insidious, unconstitutionally religious faction of the U.S. government. Shake hands with your snickering clones to the right and left of you, retard.

We all know the profound reverence with which we in the U.S.A. are told to bequeath to the easy marks who have been brainwashed since adolescence by “The Lord” to invade sovereign territories and murder on command in order to uphold “War on Terror” propaganda. “Support the Troops” is an endorsement that becomes farcical when one understands that more than half of all U.S. discretionary spending fills the DoD’s coffers; and still we are advised to believe that a few thousand Islamic militants, obscurely funded by the CIA to incite chaos whenever media support is necessary to justify the CIA’s reason for being, are a viable threat to national and global security.

Should one only hope that the current bare-assed Trump and Putin tango is some small sign of a change in business as usual? Ah, yes: Rhetorical questions are the basis of merry-go-round Corporate Media finance. Regardless, the ubiquitous, unregulated world of BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS can never be trusted. BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS  will always need another justification, another false flag, another coverup, another disavowal, another scapegoat, in order to keep gluttony’s dollars flowing. BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS  will always need one more hard-up fool’s soul to twist and break and reprogram into still one more BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS  who will help support society’s enabled corrupt underbelly. The War Parade marches endlessly down Main Street to the beat of transmitted fusion-center Hate frequencies.

Most of all, BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS  needs a Targeted Individual—-if only to update the programming, and to boost morale among all the indoctrinated, sadistic, underpaid, ego-starved predators on the home front.

The universal Us-vs-Them Armageddon Super Bowl has approached its halftime festivities, and Monkey Balls #25 nudges Monkey Balls #73 next to him, and encourages him to understand that as long as he’s JUST LIKE YOU, well then, we’re all on the REAL God’s winning team! Because the REAL God is a trillionaire, and all mere billionaires should accordingly aspire to convince the poor that everyone can depend on tax cuts for billionaires in order to afford the mass-market independence on sale at the local Costco outlet.  “God bless us, everyone! Now, let’s raise the next cell tower and rev up the ‘We Can Do It’ frequencies! Mach Schnel!”

I can always tell by the pasty shit-eating grins of Organized Stalkers that there’s an annoying old Christian mantra constantly looping around in their heads, and it has less to do with money than with conscience: “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” It can’t quite be expunged from the heads of so many of them, no matter how their military masters try to reinterpret or delete certain Bible verses that aren’t particularly appreciated as military protocol.

And oh shit! There goes another mantra evincing a goony, telltale wince on yet another gang-stalker’s false mirth: “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.”

But of course, hell-bent human devils need not worry about this minor setback. These natural humanistic axioms, which are actually Christian plagiarisms of earlier Confucianism, are rendered null and void anyway by ranting, bloodthirsty, delusional Armageddon militants who are all exclusionary religious hypocrites JUST LIKE YOU.

Besides, they can always write off those unrelenting mantras of their own consciences condemning their actions  as “enemy V2K.”

Regardless, soon enough, their military masters will jolt them out of such wasteful, reflective thinking with a quick smack to the noggin and a quick point of a finger . . .

And off you go, Monkey Balls! There you go, off and running to torture and murder again! Once again you are commanded to smite today’s “Designated Evildoer” misinterpretation of events. Yes, and to cast that misinterpreted “evildoer” into your misinterpreted “Lake of Fire”—-or whatever other disinformed definition best accommodates that illegally authorized military-grade “instrument” you’re discharging for your “God and Country” spiel—-as you unleash upon your next victim the timely and self-fulfillingly actualized flight of fancy of yet one more brainwashed, hell-bent human devil getting a pat on the back from the enabling devil behind him, in the name of your misinterpreted exclusion.

BIG BAD MONKEY BALLS: Satan’s altar boy. And your brother in Christ. Hallelujah, hypocrite! Salute your torturer.


“Are we there yet, Commander?”

“Quiet, soldier! Polish my medal, boy. We’ll be there when I say so.”

“Praise the Lord! And please, don’t tell my mother, sir.”

“Are you kidding, boy? Your mother would be proud. Trust the Lord! Do you have a younger brother?”



©2017 Paul Sylvester Stayton

“Righteous Christian Hypocrite” ©2017 by Paul Sylvester Stayton